When sleeveless?  

Jerry Seinfeld is gonna sue me for copyright if I wear this  

Me checking this everyday at 11   

Bring back MMAHQ  

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Drop some shorts so short my goods are hanging out  

For me the red one fits great but the black and pink is super tight in the armpits  

"Mom, I want the batman symbol on my rashguard"
"We have batman sybol at home"
Batman symbol at home :  

Wasn't this posted a week ago  

Id bite at $13 and $5 shipping   

L BOZO  

93 brand is the great value of jits merch  

Day in the life of a Gracie Barra student

2:00 am- Wake up

2.05am-Cold shower

2.15am-breakfast,acai, breast milk bought off Facebook, 50mg adderall

2:30am- begin workout,incline bench 2 plates,12x12 with 30 seconds of rest, no warmup.

2:45am-shrimping,4hrs (for disipline)

6:45am-cold shower

7:00am-begin sprint to gym

8:00am-arrive at gym

8:05am-get called into professors' office

8:06am-get promoted for "repeated inappropriate comments" and "predatory behaviour". My fifteenth stripe on my white belt

8:10am-sprint back home

9:10am- lunch-raw cod, acai berries on the way home, small pebbles (for digestion),50mg of adderal

9:10am-shrimping(as punishment)

3:00pm- bed time  

I just need a balanced equilibrium of acai and the chronic oss  

These needa be about tree fiddy.   

You, Me, Gas Station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course! Uh Oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means? Fish orgy! The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight, bare handed, bare naked? Oh, yes please! We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl, and we ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese™. Dance. Dance. Revolution. Revolution, overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, and black out again. Wake up, white out, which I didn't know you could do, then I smoked a joint, GREENED out, then I turned into the sun. Uh oh, looks like the meth is kickin' in, duzubuzupzudahaha, AAAAH!   

Having to call a coach "professor" is so cringey and dumb

"Professor". I mean gimmie a fuckin' break, dude. What else do you want me to call you? Your highness? Do you want me to fondle your nuts while I blow you, too?

I've seriously seen gyms where they'll say "Sensei" and the coach will be like "It's "Professor" young man!!"

Fuck off. How much of an egotist you gotta be to care about some medieval-ass title?

It's some LARPING I'd expect kids to do. "Oh Billy you have to call me supreme ruler snorlax the magical wizard!!1!"

Shut up.   

Needs a 2 for 1 deal but they are also tank tops  

Is it cheating to have sex eith my opponents wife before the match?

I was trying to get a psychological advantage over my opponent so I banged his wife. My wife walked into the hotel room I was using and she started screaming at me and calling me a cheater. She doesn't even roll so I don't understand why she would be upset about me getting an "unfair" advantage in the tournament.

I calmly explained to her that I didn't think it was against the rules of the tournament, but I don't think she believed me. She started yelling about getting a divorce. I've never heard of someone getting divorced over jiu jitsu before, but I think it'd really help my case in divorce court if I can prove that I wasn't cheating in a competition, since that's the grounds she's apparently using.   

Hello, concerned father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.   

Hey guys, I have some really spicy picture memes and reaction images that I'm trying to upload but I really have no fucking idea how. Would any of you guys know how to upload an image? Much appreciated!  

Big comic sans energy  

This just screams to me "I'm in a grungy laser tag den that hasn't been cleaned in 15 years. The sheer sweat and gunk accumulated over the years has transformed this black light illuminated hellscape into a den of musk and heat where 12 year olds prowl" I knew phalanx??? How could theu be infected by the big zoomer energy that are these spats. Also if you dont wear shorts over spats i hope that same gang of sweaty 12 year olds comes and kicks you in the shin hard as fuck  

How u gonna accost my wallet like this before the holidays  

Finna wear this to show off the collosal absolutely humongous dump truck of an ass. I squat 605 raw and would happily steal your girl, your mom, and your grandma when they even get a glimpse of my pulsating femoral artery in a full locked triangle.

Oos  

If you dont wear these with shorts over top of them I will find you   

Jewish inclusion when